The Last Pod
by Atlantic Jewel
Summary: What would happen if Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke were all fighting over The Last Pod? Do you know what a Pod is? It’s a ‘crunchy biscuit wafer with caramel covered with smooth milk chocolate’ - basically, it’s a moorish. Rated for slight suggestiveness...


THE LAST POD

THE LAST POD

**What would happen if Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke were all fighting over The Last Pod? (Do you know what a Pod is? It's a 'crunchy biscuit wafer with caramel covered with smooth milk chocolate' - basically, it's a moorish.) Who gets The Last Pod? Find out... (Warning - results may shock and/or amaze...)**

Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke were sitting in one evening, watching a new release movie on DVD, and wondering why Naruto and Sasuke didn't have girlfriends, and Sakura didn't have a boyfriend (well, _she_ knows why, because he's sitting on the other side of the couch and won't even look at her, he's watching Keira Knightly pashing Orlando Bloom and wishing he was Orlando).

They were also eating Pods. It had been Naruto's idea. That's because the Pods had been right next to the instant ramen in the supermarket, and Naruto was like: "Oh, let's get some of them too."

And Sakura had said: "Naruto, do you even know what they _are_?"

And he'd shrugged and replied: "Well, call it selective marketing."

"_What_!?" She'd screamed.

"Look, just get the...Pods!" He shrugged, as Sakura sighed and tossed a box of them into their shopping trolley.

"Hey you two!" Sasuke was already at the check-out line, with their shopping basket (he was in the express lane with twelve items, but who cares?). "Are you coming or am I gonna eat all of these...hey, what the hell's a _Devil Dog_? By myself?"

"No!" Naruto screamed.

"Coming Sasuke!" Sakura added.

Now, they were getting to the end of Pirates Of The Caribbean II, and Orlando 'died' ("Nooooo!!" Screamed Sakura. "What?" Asked Sasuke. "Oh, nothing, at least _your_ okay." She replied. And Sasuke sweatdropped.).

Naruto reached for the bag of Pods, which he had been reaching into all evening - at the same time Sakura and Sasuke did as well, as they had been doing all evening also.

There was a moment of silence, as fingers felt around for one of those four grams of munchies, and located one. One.

There was another moment of silence, as realisation set in.

"Okay, all on three," Naruto said. "Ready? One...two...three..."

"Uh oh," They all said in unison. "It's _The Last Pod_."

They all exchanged a glance.

"Soooo, who get's it?" Naruto asked, uncertainly, not taking his fingers out of the bag.

He noticed that neither of his two team mates did either.

"What do you mean 'who gets it'?" Sakura made quotation marks with her free hand. "_That's_ an _obvious_ thing to answer...hey!" She cried, as Naruto tried to pry the thing from her fingers. "What the hell do you think you're _doing_!?"

"Taking what's rightfully mine!" He replied. "So, please, Saki..."

"_Don't_ call me Saki..." Sakura said through gritted teeth.

Sasuke had a thought. "Oh, _Saki_?"

"Yes Sasuke?" Sakura said sweetly.

"May I have the last Pod, Saki?"

"NO!!"

The yell startled Sasuke so much, that he jerked his hand back, and the Pod went with it. Sakura and Naruto's hands went too.

They were all scuffling on the floor, fighting over the last Pod.

"It's mine!" Naruto cried, trying to get the Pod into his mouth.

"Eew, don't do that!" Sakura screamed. "It's miiiine!" She fought with Naruto's hand, trying to get the last Pod away from him.

"No it's not, it's _mine_!" Sasuke cried.

"Mine!" Sakura sounded just like the only child she is.

"I said it first!" Naruto shouted. "_And_ I saw them first!"

"Well _I_ put them into our shopping trolley!" Sakura protested.

"_I_ paid for them!" Sasuke yelled. "Not to mention all that _other_ stuff you guys have been eating all evening!"

"Except the Bright Crawlers!" Sakura said brightly. "I paid for those!"

"We're not talking about to Bright Crawlers, we're talking about the Pods!" Naruto screamed.

"You think I don't know that!?" Sakura replied. "Now give it!"

"No way Josè!" Naruto said firmly, holding tight to the now very smushed up Pod.

"I'll give you this if you don't give me that, now _give it_!" Sakura said softly.

"Okay!" Naruto let go of the Pod meekly.

"Good." Sakura smirked. Now, she only had to deal with Sasuke and the prize was hers!

Speaking of which...

"Sasuke?" Sakura said softly, batting her eyelashes at him (and never once letting go of the Pod). She leaned up close to him.

Sasuke gulped. "S...Sakura?" He mumbled, feeling her getting closer and closer to him.

"Sasuke..." Sakura was practically on top of him by now (and, by the way, they were both wearing jeans and jumpers - but they were barefooted?).

Sasuke was so shocked, that he..._let go of the Pod_!

Unfortunately, when he kissed Sakura, so did she. Let go of the Pod, that is.

Naruto immediately pounced on it. "Mine!" He cried triumphantly, and was _just_ about to eat the poor thing, when the front door opened, and somebody came into the living room.

"Hey!" Tobi disregarded the sight of Sakura and Sasuke on the floor, still kissing but with their eyes opened wide and staring at him in shock. Tobi just walked over to Naruto and took the Pod out of his hand. He was _just_ about to remove his mask and eat it (the Pod, not the mask), when it suddenly came to life, sprung out of his hand, and shouted in a high, squeaky voice: "Ha, ha! You'll never take me alive!" It triumphantly jumped out of Tobi's hand and out the open living room window. "Wheeeee!!" It cheered, and hopped away into the night.

They all stared after it.

Then, Sakura shrugged, and just kept on kissing Sasuke.

Tobi was upset. "Pod gone...but...Tobi still a good boy?"

"No," Naruto said, through gritted teeth. "Tobi is _not_ a good boy."

"Uh oh." Tobi said, as Naruto leapt at his throat, and the Akatsuki member shrieked like a banshee.

"What are you doing here anyway!?" Naruto shouted, as he and Tobi scuffled.

That was when Kakashi walked in through the door.

He looked over at Sakura and Sasuke, making out on the floor. Then he looked at Naruto, totally dueling it out with an Akatsuki member.

He held out his hand. "Is _this_ what this is all about?"

The Pod was in his hand.

"YES!!" Sakura and Sasuke broke apart, and everyone screamed.

"Good." Kakashi nodded, held up his other hand, which hid him removing his mask, and the Pod screamed: "No, no, noooooooo!!" And then it was gone, and Kakashi ate it.

"NOOOOOOOO!!" Sakura, Sasuke, Naruto and Tobi all screamed.

"Well." Kakashi said, placing his mask back on, as Naruto started wailing.

"AND SAKURA KISSED _HIM_!!" Naruto screamed, meaning Sasuke.

"Hey!" Sakura accused Sasuke. "You bit my lip!"

"Yeah, well you..._seduced_ me!" Sasuke shouted helplessly.

"I thought that's what you _wanted_!" She yelled.

"Tobi _still_ a good boy?" Tobi questioned.

"NO!" The three young ninjas screamed.

Tobi sighed. "Then Tobi going home." His shoulders slumped, he left the house.

"Now," Kakashi was wearing a backpack, and he reached into it and pulled out... "Here's another bag of Pods." He tossed it to the drooling ninjas. "Enjoy!"

Oh boy, here we go again!


End file.
